Most people can probably relate to the feeling of wanting to raise their kids differently than their parents did. As much as I love my parents, the 90s and 2000s attitudes towards kids’ mental health, achievement, motivation and work/life balance are not ones I care to raise my children with. (See here and here for my takes on college.)
While parenting, it’s not enough to know what you don’t want to do. You have to have a game plan and a road map to make real change. And we owe it to our kids to change the way we react to problems, and to break unhealthy cycles that have been passed down through generations. Therapy can help, but you still need practical theory and advice to really make it happen in everyday life.
Enter: parenting books. My #1 source of information when it comes to gentle, simple parenting. (Instagram influencers are great and all, but an impactful book can change your parenting for life.)
My Favorite Crunchy Mom Books
I’ve read a lot of parenting books. The titles below are the ones that deeply resonated with me–and the ones I recommend to all my friends, family, and blog readers.
Crunchy Books for a Baby/Toddler Mom
- Elevating Childcare by Janet Lansbury. Anyone who’s into respectful parenting has read this book. Lansbury discusses how to see and treat your child as a capable, whole human being from birth. This book completely revolutionized the way I approached connecting with my kids.
- Bringing Up Bebe by Pamela Druckerman. This isn’t an explicitly “crunchy” book, and it’s still worth your time to read. It discusses the differences between American and French parenting through the eyes of a mom-of-three living in Paris–and demystifies why French kids often appear vexingly well-adjusted to the adult world while American children struggle.
- Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff. The author is a journalist who visits three ancestral cultures with her toddler (the Maya people in Mexico, the Inuit people in northern Canada and the Hadzabe people in Tanzania) to learn about their parenting styes. Chores, discipline and autonomy are discussed in-depth. There are practical tips at the end of each section to try.
- The Montessori Toddler by Simone Davies. This book will make you want to do all the Montessori things in your home. It’s a cute and easy read about crafting a child-inclusive home/routines.
Crunchy Books for a Mom of Older Children
- Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne. This book is basically a primer in the Waldorf philosophy of child-rearing. When families declutter their possessions, schedules, and routines and allow for more hands-off free time, kids thrive!
- No-Drama Discipline by Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson. The authors, who are neurologists/psychologists, share the basics of science-based discipline. The scientific overload is outweighed by the fantastic strategies for calming, connecting, and repairing after meltdowns and mistakes (by both parents and kids).
- How to Talk so Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. Another classic about discipline, problem-solving and connecting with kids. It’s definitely for older-than-toddler kids but really thought-provoking about my own upbringing. And the situational comic panels are super cute and engaging!
- Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings by Laura Markham. While there is some discussion of smoothing the transition of a new baby, this book is mostly geared towards parents of multiple verbal children. The explanations and advice on reducing sibling rivalry–without turning into an authoritarian mom barking orders!–is excellent and to-the-point.
General Health & Wellness for Parents
- Last Child in the Woods by Richard Louv. Written almost twenty years ago, this book about how children are disconnected from nature is more relevant than ever. He traces a brief history of how this happened, why it’s a problem and what we as parents can do about it.
- The Creative Family Manifesto by Amanda Blake Soule. This book explains the ways that a homesteading mother of five and her husband encourage creativity in their children. From visual arts to music, home theatre productions, outdoor play and developing nature-based seasonal rituals, you’ll walk away inspired to get messy and creative with your kids ASAP.
- Raising Good Humans by Hunter Clarke-Fields. Want to break the cycle of reactive parenting–yelling, punishing, and guilt–for good? This book helps you explore your own childhood, the unhelpful behaviors you learned, and how to be a more mindful, calm parent to children of all ages.
xx Claire
